Paradise Chronicles

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything so I thought about starting a blog series called the Paradise Chronicles, which basically entails about life in Bermuda from a locals perspective.

For those who don’t know much about Bermuda, the first thing you must know is that it’s small…tiny even, at only 21 square miles you can drive around the island 5 times in one day and still have time to spare, so over time you can run out of things to do, so we get creative.

Summer time is the best, with beach parties and raft-ups galore; which is when you attach boats to each other in the sea and have one massive boat party, BBQ’s, friendly people and drinks aplenty. It’s hard not to smile.

The island itself? Is beautiful, I’ve been to most of the North Western quarter of the world but my home remains the prettiest, can’t wait to visit Asia though, I hear it’s amazing there too, but below is a shot of the sunset a beach near my place.

Image result for bermuda

Work wise? I cant hate on it at all, people here are relaxed, paychecks are big and there’s no income tax…. soo it’s a nice place to save dollaz. After living in Barcelona for University I’ve always thought of moving back, so i’ll work my ass off in real estate here for that sexy apartment in Catalunya, but until then…No worries

Life is good in paradise.

Life and it’s changes

You never bloody where its gonna take you next…. 2 months ago i was in Bermuda with the family and basically baby-sitting full-time. Now I’m touring Spain with my new girlfriend, and have a flat in Barcelona…. unexpected but I’m not complaining.

Back with more free time on my hands and writing for Stoke Travel so life is turning down a pleasant path.. Although shit can always take a left turn I prefer to think it can last a long time, plus my lady is a dream come true so I hope it does.

I still find the whole situation to be a bit surreal, transferring from Bermuda to a dame in the sunshine and endless sex… Beats the shit out of applying for boring jobs, plus Stoke is still growing and venturing to new places like Brazil and Thailand so theres no need to jump ship.

So there’s my update, we’re off to Seville tomorrow..

One Love


As I lay in my bed amidst passing over from full-time (to part-time) for Stoke Travel for a real-estate internship, I got to say its nice to finally get a chance to chill…

With a week to prepare the crossover and most of the Stoke crew attending to our surf camp in San Sebastian…there’s not as much to do as normal.

So with a free day to just do as I please, I’ve decided to just chill… the only thing I had to do was make a quick stop to the bank yesterday.

As I’ve lived in Barcelona for a considerable time I have no real desire to run around and see things like a tourist….

Instead I’ve spent my time doing things I haven’t had much time to do lately… research music, read a bit, and chill at one of my fav parks where I just laid under a tree… and enjoyed the sounds of my surrounding environment, to just relax.

Since I’ve left my country a year ago it’s been nothing but hectic, during this time I’ve:

  • Graduated from University in Barcelona
  • Completed a 3 month Eurotrip
  • Undertaken a Master’s course in London
  • Switched to crisis stricken Spain instantly for work

As I’ve also been Living with women, had Friends constantly visit and just been doing whatever I can to make a name for myself here…. finding a day for myself has been difficult.

Having a guilt-free wake n’ bake is so nice as well…all I have to do today is shop for some work clothes… that’ll only take me an hour or two, and shopping’s far from stressful.

Lately, life’s been moving so fast as well like last week for instance, I received a phone call for an interview which we could only set 2 hours before a boat party for Stoke…which I had to bartend.

So after impressing in the interview I had to rush to the Stoke office, quickly change my suit for short’s and flip-flops, as I had to get two trolleys worth of alcohol from the market for the party….. Then down beers during it. 😉

Often I’m hanging with Stoke employees after work where a gentle drink at the bar turns into a business meeting with someone who finds our company interesting.

I recently discovered a local girl who is buzzing to go work for us after testing out our San Fermin trip…her interview with my boss is today.

Yesterday, I received an email from someone in Granada who mentioned they had over 10 years of experience in marketing and were willing to move to Barcelona saying he would work for us. As he mentioned we’re a rapidly growing company he wanted to be a part of….. I forwarded it to my boss though as I’m in no position to make a call on that one.

Stoke is growing… and fast, during my first month here I was doing much more than I expected as offers and new parties were being established from every direction and I’d find myself doing 3 or more different sorts of tasks in one day.

From basic promoter, writer, negotiator, to an interviewer, flexibility is something you learn and absorb into your daily expectations here…it’s a great experience.

Area Casa is offering me just as much flexibility in their sales team as well, as they’re giving me a personal project to help their website for tourist (week-long stay) apartments grow with my connections and it’s SEO ratings.

But now as I breeze through music genres like reggae, jazz, House and old-school rap, it feels good to finally hot-box my room for the first time in a while…. Something a stoner appreciates.

So as I fade into the tunes I’m completing 100’s of years of Bermudian heritage were you just…. Chill.

How not to study for a final exam

What would you say is the normal thing to do on the eve of a final exam? Stay in…cram your ass off and hope to Christ you remember everything when the time comes… not I on this particular night.

Summer of 2010, I spent living with McCone in Barca to write my thesis…and Bergholdt from How Men Drink said he was coming back with friends for a few days.

Misfortune meant we couldn’t meet until his last night…. which was the night before my final… yaaayyy :D.

McCone left town to be with his family, but before he left I asked to him call me at 8 tomorrow morning in case things got out of hand.

I asked the new neighbours to knock on my door as well…. to be safe.

Meeting at a sushi spot for dinner I meet everyone and we started storing up for heavy drinking later…. we decided to have a few beers there of course. 😉

After dinner he said pre-drinks were at his flat and we’ll meet in a bit… so I prep for the night and grab a near full bottle of vodka from the fridge.

When I get there and plop the bottle on the table and he looks to me and says…

“Great…. That’s your bottle.”

Huh???? All that’s already planned just for me?

I soon found out why…we played a Danish card game and I turned out to be complete shit and had to down a glass of vodka for every loss…. And I lost every time!!

I went through the vodka in 15 minutes, and it turned out I had owed a drink since the bottle ran out…thus Bergholdt instantly shared his whiskey and poured me a massive shot to down…. What a friend.

I take it like a champ and we go to the club…where he bought more Vodka bottles in VIP… mas alcohol mas!!

He bought a total of 3 bottles and as the girls quit drinking for the night it was up to us to prevent wasting.

Flirting with a hot Russian I couldn’t form a sentence…or successive steps. Yet somehow I managed to get home…can’t remember how though. :/

Anyways… McCone called me at 8am like I asked, and I woke up, face planted on the floor….and then passed out. The neighbours then knocked, I thought it was a dream…eventually 30 minutes after my exam started my University calls me.

“Where are you?” they ask.

My response…..”Meh”

Eventually I gather myself and managed to make it to the exam near passing out. My professors instantly noticed my condition and asked if I went out last night.


He smirks and just points me to my seat so I can make up for lost time.

I scored an A-, now that’s how to study for an exam 😉


Sitting in my boiling hot room as Spanish temperatures have been blistering lately… I just thought I’d light one, play some music and write a bit.

Working in a country that is suffering from a banking crisis has been quite the challenge. Roughly 50% of young people here are out of work, and the fact I managed to find a job is something that still bewilders me.

It’s not as though the Spanish don’t want to work…it’s just that there is no work. Protests are held in the streets on a regular basis due to that, although tourism and the nightlife are basically carrying this city afloat at the moment…things have to change… and soon.

The threat of complete economic failure hasn’t scared me even remotely though… although I just plan on being here for the summer. I guess I really came here to in order to appreciate the value of money and struggles of life.

In Bermuda the GDP is abnormally high, and the average working person is paid between US$500 and US$1500 a week, so you never really understand life without money…. until you try to buy real estate.

As I’m always looking for a challenge rather than something boring and predictable I decided to work in Barca… and honestly I find trying to survive here a thrill.

Like I said in ‘Who I am’ some people have described me to be random.

Sharing an apartment with locals has been such a good experience as well…  and very different as I’m the only straight person in a house with 2 girls and one other guy.

So whenever La selección (Spanish futbol team) play in the Euros – we’re in the final tomorrow Viva España!!! –  I’m watching it with the girls instead of the guys…it’s a funny twist because she knows even more about football tactics than I do sometimes.

They definitely cook more than anyone else I’ve ever lived with…and quality meals too…with a vast array oils and spices every time I cook… I experiment. As a stoner, I love food… due to munchies… and since my mother taught me how to cook as soon as I was able to walk…I’m fuckin lovin it.

Making pastas, hot sandwiches, salads and roasts I’m finding myself preferring to cook at home. It’s cheaper, it’s healthier…. But damn I just love food and that kitchens my lab.

Managing money has been a challenge as well, often I leave 2 of my cards at home to prevent overspending and rely on the cash I have for a night out. It’s smart as well since pickpockets are everywhere in this city.

It’s fucking working too…I’m definitely not buying bottles in a club… but I’m living a damn good bar life. Making connections with bartenders you often get discounts or free shots.

So as I begin my working life in extreme conditions…I just wanna say it beats the shit out of studying for exams.

Now as my munchies have kicked in….I’m gonna make a meal 😉

The Stoke Chronicles: Sant Joan

Sant Joan… it’s the day that marks the beginning of summer, and the entire city celebrates it like a kid on Christmas morning. Firecrackers, fireworks, blazing, drinking and just havin’ a good time is the order of the day.

So Stoke started that beast of a day with a boat party. Describing to our guests that Sant Joan is a wild beach celebration of 10’s of 1000’s of people getting smashed until they pass out….I saw smiles go across the rows.

Bartending with my homegirl Isa from Dominican Republic, we were dishin’ out drinks at light speed but since everything is unlimited people were asking for 10 beers at a time….and coming back 5 min. later!!

In anticipation of the long night ahead, many decide to conserve their energy…but definitely not their livers…dishing out the remaining 50 or so beers across the group we stumbled on down to the beach.

Lighting a bowl… I noticed a few guests from our boat trip sit down next to me….we have a chat, they say their from Texas and noticing their eagerness I asked if they wanted to smoke too.

“Thanks man, that’s kind of the reason why I came here,” He responded.

Passing them Miss Mary we get into a conversation about how expensive weed is in London…. .XD, since we both studied there for a while.

After a few minutes I look up to see everyone else enjoying the remaining beers and sipping Sangria from a bucket with a ladle, in the name of Sant Joan.

With what must have been over 100,000 people along the shore, it was only natural we dance along all the bars that were renovated into clubs for this insane night.

As everyone had a good time I just gotta say that with us you don’t have to worry or stress about being able to go wild….. because we do everyday.

If you have a desire to party and travel, check our site

Promo Code: One Love

Barcelona Nights: New Neighbours

While writing my thesis during summer 2010, McCone (from How men Drink 2) and I had to find a new flat because Gasp had to leave for Miami.

When moving in we noticed 3 other people were moving in at the same time next door, all French and here on internships. Bumping into the girl of the group (gorgeous too) the first question she asks me is.

“Ummm… would you might know where I can find some weed?”

JACKPOT!! A pretty girl that blazes…. that is a sign of a good summer to come.

It didn’t end there as the 2 guys were up for going drinking that night, as they had cousins visiting. I agreed but McCone had family errands to attend to so I had to investigate the new crew on my own.

As the contingents join forces we go to a shot bar and drink everything from Absinthe to inflamed Cointreau. After a few go outside for a smoke and chat… standing in a group and chatting to the person next to me, I suddenly feel a tug on my bet and the hear the words…

“I want your ‘bit’.”

Bit??? Assuming it meant dick, I ask one of them to confirm my suspicions and I was right…..It does mean dick.

At this point I cant either a.) Bitch out and not get laid or b.) Accept the offer and have some fun.

Being a slut at the time I emphatically chose option b.), pulling ‘Ms.Bit’ across I challenge her to kiss me…so we do…. A lot.

We decide going home together would be the most fun but the group convinces us to go clubbing with them.

Following at our own pace we opted to go into an alley for a second…assuming we wouldn’t have much time she lifts her skirt and we have a quick doggy-style session. A few people walked past but in Barcelona you see stuff like that all the time so nobody really gave a shit.

Eventually we have to move on as our crew started shouting our names but as the night wore on we realized it was best to just go back to the bar for more shots.

The crew was really cool and the girl was having a good time 😉 but we soon called it a night. I didn’t get to take ‘Ms.Bit’ back to the house because her cousins wanted the family to stick together and so I went to sleep.

In the morning I wake up to find a note under my front door and it read:

“Randy, You are magic!”

Hehe…. That’s what she said.

The Stoke Chronicles

After splitting 4 joints the previous night I noticed it was time to get up for work the next evening which was…. A boat party.

Picking up a burger cuz I didn’t fully satisfy my munchies, I walk on to the boat to see 30+ hot blondes n’ brunettes waiting on the dock in booty shorts and skimpy tops…. nice…

Providing an extra initiative to get shit ready faster, the boat was fully stacked with girls out numbering men 3-1, as we left on time.

Grabbin’ a beer, the party gets started…. I see people dancin’, drinkin’ and grindin’… and just having a good time … so I think to myself.

“Damn, I love this job… How the hell is this a job???”

Dancin’ as the boat hops over wave after wave, it’s hard to notice the difference between my co-workers and the guests… because everyone is getting smashed.

With white girls who shake their ass better than most black women I know… to our very own ladies man (who tamed 6 dancers from Finland)… I’d say this Stoke crew is something for the record books.

Partying amongst a great blend of wild dancers and wasted youths you find yourself havin’ so much fun you forget your cruisin’ along the coast of Barcelona, Spain.

Possessing sights that can blow your mind away, you can find yourself in awe of its beauty…until one of the girls start gettin’ low right in front of you…. Then any man’s attention would switch over to one thing… ASS!!

With a never-ending flow of alcohol and good tunes you can discover yourself quotin’ lyrics from legendary ganja-smokers like Notorious B.I.G. and Kid Cudi with your umpteenth beer in hand.

Eventually after 2 hours of madness we made it back to port, but things were far from over…. whether the after-party continued in the bar, club or the bedroom, everyone continued to have  a stoked time. 😉

Mid-party I remember having a wild thought which was,

“Fuck being good to go to Heaven…. because I’m already there.”

Care to join the party? Look us up at Stoke Travel.

Promo Code: Randy

P.S. I’m not entirely sure, but I may have completed all of the above with a dislocated toe… but in a city like Barcelona, you’re never really sober enough to figure it out. Come here and you’ll see. 😉

First day with Stoke Travel

After finally completing my time in London, I pursued with my much-awaited return to Barcelona, and to begin work with Stoke Travel.

Once getting my VISA, apartment and all that pointless shit sorted I contacted my employers to see when we can meet, conveniently a team meeting was set for the next day at lunchtime.

Destination: Stoke Bar

Time: 2pm

Not entirely sure what to expect, I refrained from ordering a pint as I got there slightly early, wearing jeans and a Bob Marley t-shirt. Damn, was I over-dressed…. They arrived minutes later with torn up t-shirts, shorts, flip-flops and the girls wearing bikinis underneath.

The first order of the day, PINTS FOR EVERYONE! Damn, I love this job already, we move upstairs to chill on the couch and get our marketing plans sorted…most of us just chilaxin on our backs and talking complete bullshit the entire meeting…

Once all the business talk was over, we agree to meet for an ‘International Party’ and BBQ at the office later on…but for now we drink during the 4 hour wait, getting to know everyone and the sexy bartender the vibes got to the point where we start to dance in the street bustin’ loud reggaeton and dirty British music from the bar.

Pints continue to flow, until we realize its time to get to the BBQ… with the buzz flowing through our veins we arrive to the office. First thing I see are the interns on the terrace sunbathin’ and drinkin’ beer… whilst satisfying online demand of course. I step inside to see people takin a nap on the bed and flexin’ to good tunes whilst those awake took over all things business, cuz in the end shits gotta get done.

Getting to know the crew, I realize that this is no average bunch, ranging from Poland and Australia, to Cali and Slovakia this is proper diverse group.

Bustin’ tune from all our nations you know I gotta represent the 441 (Bermuda) with our very own Collie Buddz… considering an American was cookin the meal we had them Nachos w/Burgers n Fries…with amigos arriving high and on them munchies, plus people needin to fulfil their drunk craving, in 20 minutes …. We were a happy group of drunkies.

My memory fades a bit after that, and I took advantage of the chance to go home and get much needed rest after getting my bureaucratic shit sorted. I need all the rest I can get before the party really gets started, because in a city like Barcelona, sleep is an accessory, not a necessity.

But what I wanna say about my work crew at Stoke Travel, is that the vibes are good, the people are chill and business is poppin’.

With boat parties (with unlimited free beer n wine) and festivals galore if you ever care to join the fun hit me up or check out the website @

One Love