The Creep Magnet

From my time “Living with Women”, I noticed that typical flirting at the bar is classified differently between men and women. From a guys perspective, he either has game or he doesn’t…. from the woman’s perspective, he’s either Prince Charming…. Or a creep.

Unfortunately for one adorable small town Catholic girl from Pennsylvania, she seemed to attract all the creeps. I had never noticed so many strange men until I started hanging out with her, but damn… nearly every man she met seemed to either be a stalker or rapist.

I hardly noticed it until a trip with the ladies to Camden market when a shop owner offered a 5 pound discount on a shirt if, “He kissed her on her plump and luscious lips.”

Bad idea telling me that, as I couldn’t stop laughing my ass off…. and as I finally came down from that, another guy approached us. Playing ping-pong with two paddles by himself, he stops…glares into all of our eyes and says to me.

“Your blonde friend here has pretty eyes but they don’t compare to the beautiful blue eyes of your brunette.”

He then turns away and continues playing ping pong by himself and I turn to the small town girl and say, “I’m calling you the Creep Magnet from now on.”

It became her name as it was the only thing I referred to her as, this sweet, coffee drinking and caring small town girl just couldn’t find her Prince Charming as she ran into 3+ Creeps like the aforementioned on a daily basis.

From random old men throwing her over their shoulder in the pub…carrying her across the room and then propose, to stalkers in Paris…. Luck just never seemed to be on her side.

So I, along with many of the girls in the house did what we can to keep her hopes up for finding that Prince Charming, there were occasionally potentials but in the end they all seemed to be creeps in disguise.

At one point she just lost all hope and felt like getting smashed every night and it was fun to party with her, but there still were those creeps that would come up to her which would fuck up the mood…. Or enhance it in terms of humour.

This trend continued for some time until nearing the end of the University year she finally ran into her Prince Charming…coincidently in her second home, Starbucks.

She said they will stay in touch over the summer until she returns and I gotta say that’s so adorable (her favourite description of her) and I’m happy for you. You’ll always be in memory as my one and only Creep Magnet. 😉


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